P.S. I Love You!

The last few weeks of pregnancy felt like an ETERNITY! We were so ready to meet Paisley, but she was already proving to be a diva and was all like, "I'll come out when I want!" So, we were forced to take matters into our own hands (I mean not really "forced," our midwife - our wonderful midwife! - was afraid she was going to be too big and that we'd have to have an emergency C-section if we didn't deliver soon - which she was pretty big, so...).

Now, I'm not going to lie... I was TERRIFIED of labor. Like have a panic attack, cry when no one was looking, tell Jeff "I can't do this!" kind of terrified. I know it's supposed to be some kind of beautiful moment that brings you to tears, but all I kept imagining was the feeling of being stabbed a thousand times... Oh and dying... I even asked Jeff what he would do if I died... That was an awkward (and abrupt) conversation.

Well, thanks to the miracle of epidurals (angels singing *HALLELUJAH*) - I mean whoever created this magical elixir is the one person living or dead that I want to meet. I just need to hug him and thank him profusely!!! Anyways, thanks to my BFF, The Epi, I never had to experience the pain of a thousand deaths. And I'll tell you what, I still love that baby like no other (sometimes I cry just looking at her) and she had no problems latching right onto these breasts - seriously she just jumped right on! (Those were the two things I heard could be problematic from having an epidural - attachment and breastfeeding.) So needless to say, I had no reason to fear. I had my beautiful, life-changing, mind-boggling moment without even breaking a sweat!

This is how it went down (You may also refer to the really long, possibly boring - sometimes funny - video we made from Jeff's hospital interviews  *Disclaimer - I was medicated and sleepy, so I may seem a little... weird?*)

• Monday July 23, 2012
• 3:30 pm - admitted to Piedmont Hospital
• 6:00 pm - given Cervidil and had a disgusting hospital dinner
• 10:30 pm - sleeping-pill drunk skyped my sister (refer to video)
• Tuesday July 24, 2012
• 4:00 am - tried to run to the bathroom before I wet my bed... failed - luckily it was actually my water breaking
• 6:00 am - contractions were only a minute apart, but very mild
• 7:00 am - I seemed to be possessed - my entire body was convulsing during each contraction and I was yelling at Jeff to keep fanning me! (A little bit of the knife stabbing I was imagining) (Jeff does a great impression of my convulsions somewhere around 5:30 mins. into the video)
• 8:00 am - the most amazing doctor in the world gave me the best gift I've ever been given - an epidural! A slow drip of pitocin was also used to induce me
• 9:00 am - 1:30 pm - slept intermittently until my midwife said I was at 10 cm and ready to go!
• 1:50 pm - my mother and Kelsey (her BFF) made it to the delivery room
• 2:00 pm - commenced the pushing!!
• 2:10 pm - STOPPED the PUSHING!! They saw Paisley's big, hairy head and needed the midwife.
• 2:20 pm - midwife arrives!
• 2:36 pm - Paisley Sue Nef made her 9 lb 3 oz entrance (honestly - it was no sweat)

Now, this was Mom and Kelsey's first time attending a birth and let me just tell you they looked like they were watching the greatest movie ever made! The whole thing was just kind of funny to me. Mom and Kelsey on a couch to my left - wide-eyed and smiling, crazy nurse Angela holding a leg and coaching me to my right, Jeff holding a leg trying not to look until he was just too taken with curiosity. Then there was a team of nurses ready to weigh, bathe, suction, swaddle, shampoo, and comb Paisley. There was just so much going on.

To top it off (this is slightly gross, so stop here if you don't think you can handle it), on Mom and Kelsey's way home they called to say that Kelsey had taken a little souvenir back from the delivery... During clean up there was a little placental burst (more like a tidal wave crashing over my legs if I'm being honest) and Kelsey realized it had splattered onto her legs... Whoops!

Well, P.S., we love you and can't believe you are ours!!!!

*The sound is crazy in parts of this - sorry!

Paisley's birth from Jeff Nef on Vimeo.